i just wanted a new cable company

That's all. I thought, OK, new year, time to finally change the phone, Internet and cable. After all, I have been putting up with overpriced, crappy service for many years and there's a new company in town. Why not?

My history with my current company goes back quite a few years. They were my first cable company from before I met my husband. They gave me my first monthly fee cable box and my first taste of MTV, HBO and the OJ Simpson trial in its entirely.

Some would say my connection to them sounds sentimental. But I think it's just a comfort level. Over all these years, I've become accustomed to: rising nickel and dime fees, the cost of replacing remote controls and the additional expenses of digital phone and high speed Internet. I have gotten used to the long hold times and unreliable installers when we moved. But the cable company always followed me. And I was fine with that. I knew what to expect. It was the known evil.

Then a new cable company came to town. At first, I ignored their shiny white vans and sparkling brochures. Bu then I talked to people who took the plunge and saw their remotes. Very different from mine. Weird. Actually kind of wrong. Messed up. NOT the remote control I was used to.

But then this year I decided enough is enough. I am paying way too much for so little and the new company offers actual customer service, sustainable low prices and better options. I could have a DVR!

I went online and found a deal with cash back, DVR, and more channels. I did my online application and hit "confirm" before I could chicken out.

I counted down the days until the date of installation I had selected on their website. The two hour window came and went. Something just didn't smell right. At 2:01 pm I called. At 2:25 pm I spoke to someone who transferred me to dispatch. He talked to me for 6 minutes, told me he couldn't help me and gave me a number to call. They told me there was no installation scheduled because my Internet application never went through. She said the people she needed to consult with to get to the bottom of this were busy. It was now 3:01 pm. She offered to call me back.

At 3:21 my phone rang and it was them! She began going through what I was sure was a preinstallation checklist. But then I began to realize her questions were so basic I was back at square one; as in I was signing up for the first time. It was now 3:29 and almost 90 minutes of my life was gone. Never to be returned.

I had also heard so many times, "I'm so sorry." that I wanted to throw up.  I hung up. The new cable dream was dead.

At least I can take comfort in my remote control, right?